Afraid to make a move?
A common mistake I see on bootcamps is that guys are afraid to get sexual and make physical contact. When starting out in the game I was inexperienced with women, having only slept with one girl. Getting sexual with women was a huge mental barrier and was something I was uncomfortable with.
When in a loud environment it can be extremely difficult for a girl to hear what you are saying. Many times you have to repeat yourself. Have you ever delivered a great line only to have a girl say “WHAT!?!” and for you to repeat yourself over and over again? It’s lame isn’t it? REALLY LAME!! It kills the vibe, things get awkward and the conversation goes dead. Leaving you with only your hand to have fun with.
So how do we overcome this?
The best thing to do is to use small sound bites. By sound bites I mean short and sweet lines. If your going direct use something simple such as “I love it when your smile like that!” or if you want to tease a girl say “You’re such a geek, like my little sister”. You get the idea. Invade her personal space and whisper into her ear. Loud enough for her to hear, but not so loud that her ear crackles to the point of deafening the poor girl.
Why is getting physical so useful?
When the woman feels your touch she will associate you with the qualities of being a cool, sexually, confident alpha male. Would a sexually inexperienced guy touch her so confidently in this way? Obviously not! So get physical as soon as possible. How can you possibly have sex with a girl if you make no physical contact? The latter you leave it to make a move, the werider it gets. So get physical. Touch her! Take the risk, you have nothing to loose.
How do you get physical?
Sometimes I will be very ballsy. I will see a girl smiling at me and reach out and grab her boob straight away.Try this at your own risk and don’t hold me responsible if it backfires. However when a girl is into you, she will enjoy it as its a very cocky, confident thing to do. She might playfully punch you back, squeeze your bum, or look at you with her eyes wide open and say “Oh my god!!! I CANT believe you just did that!”. What I do recomend is you build the kino up gradually. First deliever your opener (my default is “Hey, I thought you girls look cute. I’m Cieran”) and tap the two closest girls on the upper arms and keep them there for a few seconds. Now you can put your arm around a girl and rest it on her shoulders and say “I like your friend”. From here you can just build the kino up into a hug, holding hands, kissing their neck to a makeout and then sex. It’s simple as long as you are getting compliance from her.
But I want to talk and have a conversation?
Then it’s best to ask the girl to come outside with you “for a smoke” if you smoke and for “some fresh air” if you dont. You can try running long winded routines in a loud club but it will be quite a challenge. Thats why its best to bounce a girl to a more quiet part of the club (if there is one). It gives you a great opportunity to isolate her. Her friend decides to cockblock? Befriend her. If all else fails than loose her friend. In a busy club this is not a problem. When a girl really wants an SNL she will not let her friend get in the way of it happening.
I feel uncomfortable with getting sexual?
I understand where you’re coming from. I felt the same when starting out. The only way to overcome this fear is to face it. Touch girls and kino them until you are no longer uncomfortable. You can do this by setting yourself a mission where you have to hug at least 10 girls a night. Walk up to girls and shout “It’s your birthday!!! Come here for a hug!” You will be suprised how many are willing to hug you after just a few seconds of meeting you. If they dont then move on, don’t beat yourself up about it if they are not receptive. Girls are emotional and love being huged. They hug each other all the time. We don’t because we are men and it would feel a bit wrong…. and if you did enjoy hugging men then you wouldn’t be reading this right now.
The more comfortable you become with yourself and your sexuallity then the easier it will be for you to walk up to random girls and get physical quickly. I faked it at the beginning and then came the lays. Once I starting regually having sex it became congruent to walk up and escalate on girls so quickly. It’s so in my reality, it wouldn’t make sense to not get physical with a girl I feel sexually attracted to.
How does it help you?
It can allow you to get some very quick and easy lays. I wasn’t getting sexual as I felt uncomfortable with expressing my sexual desires as a man. I was brought up to believe that it was somehow “wrong” as freinds, family, the media and social conditioning brought me up to believe so. As all I heard from television, movies, the radio was “Be a gentlemen, girls don’t like sex, they need to be wined and dined” but in reality… they like sex just as much as men. If not, more than. So be sexual! Theres been times when i’ve just walked up, said very little and left with the girl and taken her back to mine.
Try it for yourself and see. It may not be tight game, but it can be intergrated into your overall game. Or it can be an approach you decide to take one night. The message I want to get across is. Experiment, be ballsy and see how it works out. It may suprise you!
Of course it won’t work on every girl as some will be turned off by such quick escalation. However, there are usually plenty of girls out looking for an SNL and they tend to respond well to dominant behaviour. These characteristics are crucial in portraying that you are confident in yourself and able to satisfy a woman sexually. If for whatever reason you can’t close the deal due to logistics, cockblocks e.t.c, you can always follow her up at a latter date. Logistics can sometimes be overcome by taking the girl “for a walk” if you know what I mean. Some girls just wont be willing to have sex in a park or behind a dustbin, whereas others will see it as an adventure and actually prefer it rather than going all the way back to yours.
So in summary…
Dominance, balls, persistence, directness is the key. Being a passive nice guy won’t get you laid.
Hope you guys found that useful,
Cieran
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this is amazing man- I’m trying to integrate this type of honesty into my life but its hard sometimes. Its beautiful you have the balls to do this.
So tell me – As a player, pua or whatever, you can be honest in what you say, but is there a time to hold back?
I’m calling a girl this evening, and tonight is the only time we can go on a date till next week. So half of me says play it cool, but thats not what I’m really feel. The other half of me says call her, and say ‘Its been a few days since we met, and if we don’t see each other tonight the energy is gonna dissipate, so come out with me tonight, because I don’t want that to happen’.
what would you do man?
Keep it real, as it seems you know how to do..
Lp
Go for it!
Be direct, state your intentions. It allows you to cut through all the games and get straight to the point. Women find this as a very attractive, masculine quality in a man.
However…
By opening up and investing too much, too soon. You leave yourself open to getting hurt. There are girls out there also playing the game and may be out there to manipulate you. You have to know where to draw the line.
There is so much to say about direct & honesty style game that it deserves a post in itself. I’ll leave it for another time. So stay tuned…