PUA Blog
PUA Belief System and Removing Approach Anxiety (AA) - p1
Date: 16th March 2009
Author: Kingy
Ok guys be warned this is post is going to be pretty dense but well worth the read if you are looking to understand how to improve your innergame,
Understanding how you work as a human being is core because if you haven't achieved success in areas of your life other than PUA what leads you to believe you are going to get this down?
Have you ever failed to achieve something in your life?
How you can train yourself to succeed? Lets look at some of of the more common rationalisations for failure people will make:-
I didn't have enough time
I didn't have enough money
I don't have the technology
I don't have the contacts
There are many more reasons but what do these things have in common?
They are all missing resources. You can be missing all of these things but this is not usually the defining factor of why you didn't achieve what you wanted to.
What it 99% of the time comes down to is having the (1) correct emotion and (2) map of the world.
The emotion you are in determines what you are going to do in that moment or the action that you will take. There are over six thousand possible different emotions that a human can have, so it is important that you try to focus on the ones that will benefit you the most.
There are people that no matter what happens to them can find a way to get pissed off, where as others will always find a way to be happy. The list of different emotions can go on and on, guilty, sad, depressed, self critical, angry, motivated etc
What emotion are you in?
Your model / map of the world looks at your beliefs and whether you feel like you deserve to become the person you want to be. Changing your belief system takes time and I will break this down in more detail in another post. Just be moving forward slowly but surely regardless in the direction you want to go and your beliefs will gradually change.
All humans are different but we are fundamentally driven by the same six human needs. We will all try to full-fill these human needs but in different ways.
Needs of the Personality
Certainty
Uncertainty
Significance
Connection and love
Needs of the spirit
Growth
To contribute beyond ourselves
Everyone is always meeting the first four needs (needs of the personality) but people have different maps of the world so will reach them in different ways.
For example a criminal might get his certainty from knowing people will respond to him, his uncertainty is the police, his significance comes when he holds a gun to someone's head, his connection and love might come in the form of his gang. Everybody is full-filling these needs right now on autopilot just in different ways which is governed by their map of the world and where they fit in.
The final two needs come under the heading The needs of the spirit, these are the things that will fill you up. They will make you the awesome person that you can be. This will allow you to walk up to the girl and just say "Hi", she will immediately respond. She will notice your positive beaming energy, how you walk, your sense of purpose and your deep knowing inside that you are a good giving person.
Before next week right down a list of goals that you want to achieve and start taking little steps to achieving these things, no matter how small they might be. Also try to do one good thing for somebody else, whether its helping out at a conservation center, volunteer work, animal care. These are things that will fill you up with the good positive energy and turn your game to dynamite, if you want natural game you must be living your life in the correct way and this is the first starting block.
End of Part 1
To be Continued Next Week......